ice and fire

sige magtagalog na lang muna ulit ako. pati nga sa tagalog nabubulol na ako. not that hindi ako nabubulol nun. ayan. magulo ang aking pag-iisip. all these previous months of a maximum of 2 hours avail in the call center has made me read a lot, well read a series that is, it easy reading just one series compared to reading several books with several themes. the title of this one is song of ice and fire by george martin. a good friend recommended it to me, and dang, it got me hooked. i've downloaded some pirated copies online so i can read them while im doing nothing, but i've also both copies so i can continue reading them at home. kitang kita naman nahook ako...
i've almost forgotten the pleasure tthat is in books because i haven't been reading nor writing anything during my first three months at work. i have only read several online comics whichare again pirated (darn, im a sinner) and played a lot of flash games online that i think my eyes looked a lot worse. well there we ahve it. im reading again, and im also writing again. in vain. darn.. i should still be reading the fourth book but darn yahoo doesn't allow me to attach the downloaded pdf file. i'll try it with my google account after the shift. and the fourth book pala is hard covered and costs 1,500. kumusta naman un. di pa ako gumagasto ganun kamahal for abook. i'll just patiently read them on the computer. ayan hanggang ngayon kuripot pa rin ako. sige save save ulit.

writing

tagal ko na di nagsusulat dito ah. nakalimutan ko na nga rin ata magsulat. the last paper that i've done was... ughmmm... 8 months agooooo. damn... what have i been doing all these times. anyway.. stream of consciousness. kelangan maregain ang spontaneous flow of thoughts and coordination of ideas with the fingers that type. i've been in the call center industry for what, 7 months now. i applied here just so i can practice my communication skills and speak more fluently in english. not that i don't know, it's just that taking philo classes in filipino has also in away made me think in filipino. eh tangina, english naman ang language ng business world eh. ayan tuloy napapatagalog na naman ako. nampucha. what has happend to me. sige lang dadadada ng dadada.
ayan tagalog ulit... save publish...

ATENEO crosslist from the ihanzki

(x) eat at Manang’s (sky flakes lang)
(x) learn the alma mater song (learned but not memorized)
( ) get on the dean’s list (tried...)
(x) sleep on a bench (in a chair lang during class for two periods!)
( ) be a TNT!
(x) jog around the campus in the evening (definitely)
(x) visit the art gallery (once in 4 years)
(x) know at least one xerox lady
(x) get a Jesuit for a teacher
(x) itch from higad bites (memorable, higad got in my brief.. damn)
(x) have gotten an F in something (taekwondo!)
( ) have taken a crap in school
(x) watch a La Salle vs. Ateneo UAAP game
(x) give a powerpoint presentation (everyone does)
(x) study in the caf (once or twice lang... im a library boy)
(x) watch a T.A play (ofcourse)
( ) sit on the SEC ledge and watch the stars (the sun lang)
(x) eat in Full House, Martha’s Kitchen, and Ken Afford (ken afford lang)
(x) sleep in the lib (definitely)
(x) visit Mr. San Andres (yeah..)
(x) go to the chapel (always)
(x) have gotten a pebble stuck in your shoe/slippers in the middle of the quad
(x) cut class with your block to watch a movie
(x) sign up for those institutional (i.e. difficult but brilliant) teachers (roque, dacanay, calasanz, angeles)
( ) go to CERSA night
( ) have tried siomai rice
(x) learn how to smoke
(x) fall in love
(x) actually read the book you keep borrowing from the lib
(x) play cards during your free time
(x) dress in business attire
(x) learn to stay awake for more than 24 hours straight
( ) have gotten side comments from ASSOC
( ) take (and enjoy) Saturday classes
(x) go to your immersion
(x) eat Food for Thought sandwiches
( ) get a boyfriend/girlfriend again
(x) take time to read the vandalism in the CR doors
( ) watch "Minsan Lang Sila Bata" and "Macho Dancer" for class
(x) do a last minute paper (most of the time)
(x) have spent a lot for 1x1 ID pictures (got some more left)
(x) get exempted from final exams
( ) attend a college mass
(x) promise to quit smoking
( ) play hide-and-seek in the mini-forest (they do?) hahaha.
(x) know where the best restrooms are on campus haha
(x) join an org
(x) allow yourself to make mistakes
( ) take summer classes
(x) admire the sacred heart statue in the evening
(x) make a video for a project hehe.
(x) have a crush on a teacher
(x) attend a Jesuit retreat (a must for everyone)
( ) have gotten a parking ticket
(x) come to school in your crappiest yet most comfy clothes
(x) learn how to use the Bayantel pay phones
(x) participate in school activities
( ) catch the Blue Babble Battalion tryouts
( ) date an Atenean
(x) ride a tricycle on campus
( ) find a tambayan painting room!
(x) admire the marikina valley at night
(x) go drinking along Katipunan
( ) learn how to beg for a higher grade
(x) use your cuts wisely
( ) volunteer to be class beadle
( ) had the worst lottery schedule for reg
(x) admire the trees on campus
(x) have forgotten about your freecut and gone to that class
( ) eat in the ISO canteen
( ) be active in your org hahaha.
(x) have signed up on an ACP class just because the girl or guy u like signed up for it
( ) get as many app forms as you can during the job fair
(x) learn how to cram (and still get A's)
(x) sell tickets (or watch) an org-sponsored movie premiere
( ) save money to Xerox all of your seatmate’s notes
(x) have accidentally seen a make-out session
(x) check out the Meron Lagoon and Lambingan Bridge
( ) have dozed off in class in Bel right after a class in CTC/SOM/Comm. Bldg or vice-versa
(x) learn how to work with groupmates from hell
( ) perfect the art of parking on campus
( ) had a bad encounter with one of the guards on campus
(x) develop a love for sisig
( ) learn how to pronounce "AEGIS" properly
( ) have used typing rooms at the library
(x) have reserved a classroom, AVR, etc. for a class or org function
( ) have asked the library for an endorsement to research in other libraries
(x) have lost a perfectly functioning umbrella
(x) have used consultation hours properly
( ) Looked forward to lab breakage refund. never did.
(x) visit the Guidance Office
(x) and Infirmary

Bicol express Andes version

sangkap
1 kilo pork meat
1 cup bagoong alamang
salt
vetsin (ajinomoto)
2-3 cups gata ng niyog
pinya (sliced into cubes)
garliconion
sili

paano niluluto
1. pakuluan muna ang 1 kilo baboy hanggang sa lumambot (30-45 min). huwag pabayaan. baka lumambot mxdo. 1B. habang ginagawa ito, hugasan ang alamang ng 2-3 beses para mawala ang alat.1c. Hiwain din ang mga malalaking sili para lumiit. xempre.

2. hiwain ang baboy into cubes at itabi. pwede mo rin gtiman kaso wala pang lasa ang karne. matabang.

3. pagkatapos, ilagay ang gata ng niyog sa kawali (isama dito ang konting dinurog na garlic at konting hiniwang onions), at pakuluan. TANDAAN! habang pinakukuluan ang gata, stir it constantly.

4. kapag kumulo na, ilagay ang cubed baboy meat at hiontayin ulit na kumulo. isama na ang bagoong alamang. stir, then taste. kung mxdo maalat, wala tayo magagawa. kaya Waring, kalahati muna ng alamang ang ilagay. dagdagan na lang kung matabang.

5. ilagay din ang konting vetsin at asin (depende sa panlasa mo)kapag kumulo na uli, ilagay ang hiniwang sili at hintaying KONTING KONTI na lang ang sabaw.

6. ilagay ang hiniwang pinya, mix, then serve.Ikaw na lang mag-estimate sa lahat lahat na gagawin. bahala ka sa diskarte.happy cooking happy bicol expressing hehes

Kids

Ang Karinderya (short short version)

Alas onse ng gabi. Nakalugmok si Mang Jose sa bangketa ng kanyang munting karinderya. Malalim ang iniisip."Paubos na ang supply sa ref. saan naman kaya ako ulit kukuha?", tanong niya sa sarili. Nagulantang siya nang may dumating na pulis. Pinagpawisan si Mang Jose.
"Sisig nga please, dine in." sabi ng pulis.

Napabuntong hininga. Inabutan niya ng pinggan at kutsara ang pulis. Hinainan ng isang platong sisig.

Bata pa si Mang Jose noong natutunan niyang magluto. Palagi niya noong pinapanood ang kanayang inay kapag nagsisimula nang maghanda sa kusina. Lubha niyang ikinatutwa kapag hinihiwa na ng ina asa dalwang piraso ang tainga ng baboy.

Binuksan ni mang jose ang radyo. Bumulalas ang malakas na boses ng announcer.: "Hanggang ngayon wala pang malinaw na pahayag ang mga pulistungkol sa layunin at kinaroroonan ng serial kiler." Nilipat ni Mang JOse sa FM: kasalukuyang pinapatugtog ang "Your time's gonna come" NI Led Zepellin.

Nagsimula na lamang siya magluto nooong namatay ang kanyang mga magulang. Nalunod sila sa ilog noong umagang magsasampu na si Mang Jose. Hanggang ngayon hindi pa natatagpuan ang kanilang mga banggkay. sa isip ng batang Jose, alam niyang pinagkakain na sila ng mga laman tubig.

Nagsalita ang pulis: "ang sarap ng luto mo pards... dito ulit ako sa susunod."

tahimik na pinanood ni Mang Jose ang matakaw na bisita. Magiisang linggo nang nakatambay ang mga pulis sa baryo. Hinihinala nilang dito nagtatago ang serial killer.

ang serial killer. siyang ang bagong kilabot ng probinsya. kinakatay niya ang mga biktima, dati mga babae lamang, pero ngayon mga bata na rin. kinukuha ang tainga, dila, at mga laman-loob, at tinatapon ang katawan sa ilog. hindi na makalabas labas ang mga tao dahil sa takot.

Kaya nga nagkakaporblema si Mang Jose. sikat ang kanyang karinderya noon pero kukunti na lamang ang nangahas na lumbas sa gabi at kumain doon. Idagdag pa ang paubos nang laman ng kanyang ref.

"Pahingi na rin ng tubig, " sabi ng pulis. biglang kumislap ang mga mata ni Mang Jose. "KUmuha ka nalang sa loob" sagot niya "doon sa dispenser." Tumayo ang pulis at pumasok sa loob dala ang maliit na baso.

Nakangiti na si Mang Jose. Sinundan ang pulis dala ang kutsilyo ng kanyang nanay.

Bagong Putahe. Nyahaha.

BLog things

my Jap name is Yutaka Kuga.

My Superhero Name is The Steel Singer Your Superpower is Extra-dimensional Your Weakness is Tummy Rubs Your Weapon is Your Sonic Crossbow Your Mode of Transportation is Pegasus.

You havea passion for everything - including sleeping.Outgoing and brash, you tend to still shock those who know you well.You tend to be selfish. You are the most likely type to hog the covers.You gravitate toward comfort and don't like extreme situation

You're an expressive, offbeat blogger who tends to write about anything and everything. You tend to set blogging trends, and you're the most likely to write your own meme or survey.You are a bit distant though. Your blog is all about you - not what anyone else has to say.

Mine mine mine

Reveal mine:Submit the code xyzzy, and push KEYPAD ENTER and LEFT SHIFT when the game loads. Move your pointer over a square with a hidden mine will result in a very small black pixel appearing in the top right corner of the screen. Or submit the Code SHIFT + SHIFT + xyzzy + SHIFT + SHIFT after moving the pointer over the game area. You won't be able to use this code for Windows ME.

Get unlimited time:)Press and hold the Left Mouse Button + Right Mouse Button and push ESC. OR press and hold the Left Mouse Button + Right Mouse Button + CTRL.Sound effects:)Remember to create a backup copy of a file before attempting to use your text editor to edit that particular file. Use your text editor to alter the "winmine.ini" file. Add the line "SOUND=3".

Change best times:)Remember to create a backup copy of a file before attempting to use your text editor to edit that particular file. Use your text editor to alter the "winmine.ini" file. Alter the lines labeled "Name1", "Name2", and "Name3". Just change the name after the "=" sign, with the name you wish to have appear on the best times list. You can also if you wish to edit the times which appear on the list, by altering the lines "Time1", "Time2", and "Time3", to that particular number of seconds.

Get an easy win:)In the GAME option and click on CUSTOM. Make the size as follows: height 24, width 30 and 10 mines. You should unlock a large number of mines on your first click. Upon winning the game the smiley face will be wearing sun glasses.

Jealousy/Envy

jealousy/envy
madaling magselos o mainggit
bakit?
ang tanong e, what makes it even possible?
kasi one possesses something that i dont have.
why should u care that he possesses what you dont?
kasi i want to be an UBERMAN.
oh.. so is it right to say that the natural inclination of man to top other people is a cause for his jealousy?
yeah... yeah?
so man shouldn't top other people and be content in sulking, no competition, just be a drop out kasi jealousy is bad?
no... competition is good but if it is a cause for hatred and quarrel among supposed brothers or sisters... then it does not become good.
does competition always lead to hatred and dissent?
not always... there are times that competition is fun..
is competition fun when ur losing?
yeah... it can... but hard nga lang..
it's easy when u get used to it.
to overcome jealosy... always think that there is always something more that you have that the other don't. and being happy at other's success is some admirable value.mahirap pero posible.

hopeful Romantic

knock knock knock..
who is it?

the yard man...
just a sec...

;) ;) ;) on second thought, affairs aren't such bad ideas afterall.
The stealth mode really always works.

ngak

Hopeless Romantic

Knock, Knock, Knock
Who is it?

Open the door so you'll know...
But i can't...

Even if i serenade you?
Please don't..

But i like you...
But i'm inlove..

can you not love me?
Please go away...

will you leave my heart in pain?
i do not know you...

You will if you open your door...
i'm sorry...

open just a crack so i may see you before i go...
good bye...

tsktsktsk..
moral: give it up on taken women. you'll only be looking and feeling pathetic.

Sin and Will

Stain is undesirable. Comes with the idea of pureness/whiteness.
So a stain in a stain is not a stain.”
“only a stain in a something clean can be called a real stain.”
So, prerequisite for stain is an idea of cleanliness/purity/whiteness
Thus, there is sin because there is goodness. Anything that stains goodness is sin.

What is goodness?
--Care for self and others.
What is sin?
--Anything that hurts myself or others.
How is myself/others hurt?
--When I go against the will of God.
What is the will of God?
--Growth which is beneficial only to us.
--Thus, all commandments have an underlying theme of GROWTH and all SINS against God as confirmed by the church has an underlying theme of UNGROWTH.
Why the need to grow?
--To realize the self’s full potential some of which are HAPPINESS, ability to ARTICULATE thoughts and feelings, MATURE in relationships
--Thus, God’s will is for man to be happy. In realizing the self’s full potential, others are going to be cared in the process.
Thus, God’s will is love, for and in all mankind.
Thus, Let your will be done would mean, let me love and teach me how to love.

Qoutable Qoutes

Therese:

“perfection consists in doing his will, in being what he wills us to be.” “ demons… are cowards, capable of fleeing before the gaze of a little child”

Archie:

“gawin na natin para matapos na.”
“the most fatal of thoughts is to think that there is a lot of time.”
“when tomorrow has been used, you better do it now.”

JBoy:

"be a flower in full bloom, get carried away by emotions coz thats who you are"

Martin:

"it is god's will when you are happy and at peace."

Enemies of Meditation

time consciousness
fear of knowing something
hesitation/acceptance of self
/truthbliss/insight scavenging
symphony of sounds - nakakaantok
tiredness

Security Guard's LIfe

There is no job more boring than that of a security guard. Believe me. In my twenty years as a security guard in this god forsaken train station, I can say nothing else truer.

Sulking in benches
Sleepy in position
Same design of uniform
Point point at bags
Snubbed by people
Staying in one place

Phew.. I need action.Iv’e done so before: I pushed a drunk man seconds before the train came dashing. I loved that sound of cracking bones and splittering blood muffled by the electric buzz of the trian that passed. Damn.. and now there’s this pregnant woman…

Multo sa Kuwarto

Matulog, mahimbing, managinip
Mamamatay ang iyong kapatid.
Mangangaliwa ang iyong ama.
Magpapakamatay ang iyong ina.

Gumising agad, sumigaw.
Lumuha at manahimik.
Narinig mo ba ang halakhak
Sa kaloob looban ng pader?

Tumingin sa bintana, huminga
Titigan ang akasya, titigan
Ayon, lumipad ang ibon.Huwag ka nang matulog.

Di Nakita

Sa gabi, di mo nakitang
Nabuksan ang lagusan
Ng dalawang kunehong
Naiinip sa maliit na kulungan

Gustong makalabas
Makatakas kahit panandali
kapag mataas ang bakod
At matigas ang lupa

Pinalambot ng laway
Nagtulunganang magbungkal
Pumatong sa isa
Para matalon ang bakod

Di mo nakita ang pagbubungkal
Di mo nakita ang pagpapatong
Nakita mo lang nakalaya na sila
Patuloy na lumalaking, masaya.

The Realm of Nothing

We came from there but we can never turn back anymore.
Jesus came from there but he came out so he closed it.
What is in there? --- wrong question… nothing is in there… I can’t talk about it… Creatures are only in the realm of IMPERFECTION… the devil is not there…. If he is a creature…

“nothing” creeps up on us influencing our actions…
“perfection” also creeps down to us influencing our actions…

If the gates to nothing were closed, how does nothing creep up? Geez… I don’t know… my previous resolutions cannot be wrong….

The previous reflections on “nothing” were the afterlife nothingness…
But the influence of “nothing” is still pretty much present in this life… how can it be said to be closed?

Aha!!! It will only be totally closed at the end of time!!! When everyone of us has walked the bridge to God… becoming human is possessing the influences of “nothing”. Not until we share the diviness of God will we totally disrobe ourselves of the effects of nothing..
Okay. Resolved. Done.. enough.. im tired.

New Problem: Dwarfss

What about the dwarfs of Aslan?
Did Jesus really close the gates?
-- salvation as conditonal (only if you accept the hand, will you be saved); freedom unmessed by God.
-- true, but we will never not accept the hand as had been said.
--the ultimate meaning of the cross is that everyone is saved from becoming nothing.
--everyone can do evil with corresponding consequences of turning less and less human/perfect till the helll part, where they eventually realize and repent.

How about MONSTERS? Do they exist?
--Gee. I don’t wanna know… : -(, reserved for next time. What are monsters? Being creation is having the capacity for being perfect. Monsters with reason vs. animalistic monsters… etc etc etc)




Did aslan really leave the dwarfs to wallow in their denials/confusion? C.S. lewis didn’t continue the story of the dwarves… what could have happened to them…

Case: Dwarfs thrown in the barn – dead – they think they are still in the barn but actually they are already in paradise. But they don’t realize that. They were wallowing in their own thoughts.
Aslan gives them more and more and more food. (implies a non cruel lion, not wild either, but loving. Ok! Resolved!! Aslan is all perfect. He only resorts to seemingly cruel attititudes to help his creatures grow)
The Dwarfs take the gifts but thinking of them as mere stuff in the barn.

Possibility A: Dwarfs: oh im getting fat with this stuff. This musn’t be barn stuff. Oh gracious! Im in Aslan’s Country!
-- blessings are realized…. One sees the reality… one repents…

Possibility B: Dwarfs get thinner and thinner. Their minds make what they eat unnutritious. Mind power makes real what they think (placebo effect)… possible kaya? Hmmm…

Another question of the possibility of complete total denial….
ASLAN must CARE for the dwafs!! His perfection requires him to care about the least of his creatures even these despicable dwarfs. He wouldn’t give up on them. He’ll keep on giving food, giving and giving. He will alter their environment/sourroindings to make them realize all their gifts and blessedness…

Can one totally deny such magnitude of love and generousity??? Huh???
Let’s get more real: do I know anyone who seems hopless and always denying the goodness of lfe? Is there someone else like the dwarfs in reality?

Sin—denial of the gifts of God. Can one be stuck in hell, stuck in the pit? This was already resolved pala… Aslan has done his work. The gates to nothing are closed. The continous offer of food is given like the extendable hand of Jesus from the bridge…

Aha!!! Salvation is for everybody unconditionally, universally. The cross embraces alll all all all. He can’t mess with our own free will. But we eventually realize the consequences we give to ourselves due to denying him when we feel the pain of crashing to the ground, the pain of hunger, the pain of fire, or wwhatever word we can use to describe the end point of denial. The pain wasn’t caused by God but by the influence of “nothing” on us.
Gee.. im confused…

The End point of Denial

So there must be a point where man who wants to fall pa deepr, ultimately realizes the consequences of his aciotns to himself. The point of ‘OH I’m becoming nothing na pala.” “Oh im gonna hit the ground hard.” Or “Ouch!!! Aray!!!” “the pit of the hole.

Jesus’s death and resurrection saved us from total wreckage of self. By dying he became one with nothing, but he rose from it. And he closed the gates so that we may not fall there anymore. Thus with Jesus, it becomes impossible to turn back into nothing!!!!!!!!

Haay.. I’m tired thinking…

Summary…
{ }, # jesus#, 1,2,3,4,…. #jesus#.. perfection
By coming form perfeciton he opens the gates to it.
By dying, he closes the gates to it.Astig si Jesus noh?